Friday, November 21, 2014


***DISCLAIMER*** The following review is entirely my opinion. If you comment (which I encourage you to do) be respectful. If you don't agree with my opinion, that's fine. To each their own. These reviews are not meant to be statements of facts or endorsements, I am just sharing my opinions and my perspective when watching the film and is not meant to reflect how these films should be viewed. Finally, the reviews are given on a scale of 0-5. 0, of course, being unwatchable. 1, being terrible. 2, being not great. 3, being okay. 4, being great and 5, being epic! And if you enjoy these reviews feel free to share them and follow the blog or follow me on Twitter (@RevRonster) for links to my reviews and the occasional live-Tweet session of the movie I'm watching! At no point do I make a "horny" joke in this review.  I deserve a fucking medal!

Horns – 3 out of 5

We all have a little evil in us.  Even the best of us—the ones who feed the homeless, rescue stray cats, and go out of their way to pick up stray LEGO bits from your carpet so you don’t step on them while venturing blindly in the dark and half-drunk from sleepiness—even those people are capable of having some darkness around them or forced upon them.  For example, the food they fed the homeless was probably those cats and, not to mention, they clearly broke into your house in order to pick up those LEGOS.  However, what if the evil inside you is supernaturally granted to you so you can solve the murder of your girlfriend?  Imagine how many cats you could kill and feed people then!

Of course, Daniel Radcliffe could never be evil...he's too adorable.
The horns took away his powers to get super drunk
and turn his floor into a ceiling.
Ig Perrish (Daniel Radcliffe) had the greatest gal in the world.  He thought he was going to be with Merrin (Juno Temple) the rest of his life but she had other plans.  One night, when Ig was going to propose, Merrin mysteriously breaks up with him and, after they part ways in a storm of shouting and hurt feelings, Merrin is found raped and murdered.  Not surprisingly, Ig is blamed for the crime.  Desperate to clear his name and regain some sort of civil standing in the community, Ig wakes up one morning to discover horns have unexpectedly grown on his temples.  Ig suddenly finds that he can bend people to his will be giving them permission to enact their darkest desires and he quickly decides to use this new found power to locate the real killer.  Soon, as the pieces start to unravel and the yarn begins to fit together, Ig learns that his powers are growing and he can now use them to not only find out the truth but makes those who have wronged him or even flat-out falsely accuse him pay for their transgressions.  However, no amount of supernatural abilities or stylish horns can prepare Ig for the truth and who really killed the woman he cared so deeply for…

Turns out she was just murdered for her hair by wig poachers...which is a
thing I made up and applied to the film.
For the most part, Horns is a decent film.  The acting is really good, the story is interesting, and the few instances of special effects are really well done.  However, there is a single problem that harms this movie and keeps it from being something more than just an average experience.

"Average?  With these perfect eyebrows?"
"I turned my head and cough almost five minutes ago, Doc."
The trailer for Horns made the film look like a dark comedy and the final product was that…but it was also a heavy drama, a horror film, and a supernatural crime thriller.  The overall tone and vibe of the movie changes with literally every scene.  One second Ig is using his powers of suggestion to get a horde of reporters fighting in order to get an exclusive with him or accidentally convincing an old man to pull his pants down in order to show everyone his penis and then the next minute Ig is weeping over the lost of his girlfriend or his overall feeling of isolation and frustrations over the battle he fights for innocence.  During this you laugh and then find yourself crying with him.  Then, after that, the film will take on a horror feel as Ig takes his revenge on someone who wronged him in the investigation and then, the next minute, he’s using his powers to get to the bottom of the crime.  Having a film jump genres is all well and good but the film lacks balance and is constantly shifting tones.  It makes the film feel jumbled and chaotic.  Strange when you consider that this was directed by Alexandre Aja…who directed Piranha 3D.  He kinda nailed the comedy and horror mixing with that one, in my opinion.

He takes the word of the Lord very seriously.
"Ha ha, we're friends and having fun.  What were we
talking about?  Oh yeah...the death of my girlfriend."
The lack of a cohesive tone is really the only drawback the film has.  While it is a big drawback and ends up making the film just okay, everything else about the film is still really good.  The story is definitely an interesting one and the acting in the film is very choice.  There isn’t a single cast member that isn’t pulling their weight or slacking.  Whether it be the drug addicted brother of Ig played by Joe Anderson, Ig’s tormented parents by James Remar and Kathleen Quinlan, the waitress who claims Ig is the killer played by Heather Graham, the grieving father of Merrin played by David Morse, or the man who is taking upon himself to try and clear Ig’s name through the legal system played by Max Minghella.  Everyone really does their roles quite well.

Oh, she works at a dinner called "Eve's" and it has an apple for a symbol...
very subtle.
The highlight of the cast, however, was the lead actor Daniel Radcliffe.  Radcliffe will always be Harry Potter to me.  Try as I might, I have a hard time seeing him as anything but.  That’s no knock on his acting because he’s come a long way since his days at Hogwarts.  That being said…I still only see him as the bespectacled wizard.  It’s hard not to because once an actor gets put in a role that ends up becoming a piece of pop culture, it’s almost impossible to see them as anything but that role.  And when that role is played ridiculously well, it becomes even that much harder to separate the character from the actor.  Peter Weller will always be RoboCop, Harrison Ford is always going to be Indiana Jones and Han Solo, Christopher Reeves will always be Superman, and Nicholas Cage will always be Not The Bees! guy.  That being said, Radcliffe was incredible as Ig.  He was able to ride the constantly shifting tones and be whatever the scene needed him to be.  He was wickedly funny at times, sympathetic and touching at other times, and was all-around captivating as the hell possessed justice seeker.

Ice Cube saw this and immediately asked, "There snakes out there dat big?"
Horns probably could have been far more entertaining if the movie kept a balance between the constantly shifting tones it possessed but, as it is, the film is entertaining.  It never gets boring and is capable of being amusing, touching, and engaging.  Additionally, Daniel Radcliffe is quite impressive to watch and helps keep the film from becoming mundane or muddled from its lack of tonal balance.


  1. One last movie, and I swear to god I will leave you alone. Please review the Independent classic Swingers (1996).

    1. Ha ha... I put it on the Viewing List.


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