Dark Skies – 3 out of 5
When is Hollywood going to make an alien film that focuses entirely on them abducting hillbillies, anally probing them and then releasing them back on the world where they can entertain us with their stories? Or one where dudes with freaky haircuts that they clearly did themselves talk about how all wonders that mankind has triumphantly achieved throughout history was done totally by aliens? Never, I guess.
|The look of horror from someone who just saw the size of the probe.|
|"You wanna kill me, aliens? Over my dead body--wait."|
|It's like some kind of birdemic. Quick, grab a coat hanger!|
Lacy becomes increasingly more frightened (while their neighbors become more paranoid) as whatever is tormenting them has set their sights on the youngest son; Sam—who refers to these intruders as “The Sandman.” Doing what any of us would do when unexplainable shit goes down, she hits the internet and comes across a man who seems to know exactly what they are going through. Lacy and Daniel seek out the wisdom of the quiet recluse; Edwin Pollard (J.K. Simmons), where he informs them that they have been chosen by a species not of this Earth…and they are coming to take them away.
|"You know we have some time before the aliens get us..."|
I saw this trailer when it was coming to the theaters and was really sold on the idea of seeing it. I 100% believe in the existence of other life in the universe (but don’t believe they have been here) and I love films about aliens—no matter the genre—although, sometimes they can get pretty freaking bad. The thing, however, that really sold me on this was the horror aspect—yes, a lot of movies about aliens are horror based but this one looked like it took the aspect of a ghost-infused scary movie but did it with aliens. From the trailer, it looked like it was going to have all the subtle (yet urine-soaked pants) horror of Signs without all the talks about God, M. Night’s ego trying to invade pointless scenes with himself in it and Mel Gibson’s rant about how Jews are taking over the government (I might have made that last one up…but it’s Mel, so who knows?).
|"I can't hear anything, my hair has grown into my ears."|
For the most part, I enjoyed Dark Skies but it did lack in a single department that kept me from enjoying it more. First off, I really dug the story because it was a scary alien abduction film without getting too crazy (however, I still think Fire in the Sky remains one of the best—and probably the most frighteningly realistic looking alien abduction films). The acting is all great with Keri Russell and Josh Hamilton really carrying the film well as the two parents who are trying to figure out exactly what the fuck is going on in their home without shrieking and running for the hills like I would and also trying to maintain a balance of dealing with their personal issues (like money and no job) and keeping up appearances so the neighbors don’t think the Manson family redux just moved in next door. I also really enjoyed Simmons role as the abduction expert that deals the bad news to the husband and wife. Simmons role is small but memorable thanks to his quiet and eerie delivery—and Simmons is just an all-around awesome actor so getting to see him in a movie, even for a few minutes, is like watching a rainbow rain hundred dollar bills.
|I think he knows how awesome he is.|
|Some little boys find no joy when a bikini clad young|
woman is around them.
|Unlike the other times, this time the alien was just tucking the kid in.|
|For some reason, the blood soul-patch never caught on.|
|This is one of those HOLY CRAP moments.|
Dark Skies is a pretty decent alien-themed horror film that does offer your spine some courteous chilling and the story is pretty solid in its construction with the support beams being some strong performances from a small cast—not entirely sure why I broke into a construction metaphor there when I should have went with a U.F.O. metaphor or another anal probe joke. The only real downside I had for the movie was the fact the deep scares this movie could have created wasn’t fully utilized—however, a nice use of misdirection and a twist in the film’s ending helps make this complaint minor and ultimately makes the film a pretty decent one.