Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Paul McCartney Really Is Dead: The Last Testament of George Harrison

***DISCLAIMER*** The following review is entirely my opinion. If you comment (which I encourage you to do) be respectful. If you don't agree with my opinion, that's fine. To each their own. I am just sharing my opinions and perspective. Finally, the reviews are given on a scale of 1-5. 1, of course, being terrible. 2, being not great. 3, being okay. 4, being good and 5, being epic!

Paul Is Really Dead: The Last Testament of George Harrison - 1 out of 5

Back during Beatlemania, a rumor began to circulate that Paul McCartney was dead. Of course, this theory was bullocks despite all the claims of "evidence." Whether the majority of this evidence was something people were desperate to believe and found patterns where patterns didn't exist or if some of it was just John Lennon's sick (but delightful) sense of humor egging them on, we'll never know but there is a group of people--possible the same ones who believe we faked the moon landing and wear foil on their heads to stop aliens from reading their thoughts--believe that Paul McCartney died in a car accident in 1966 and was replaced by a doppelganger.

This documentary (if you can call it that) follows these "clues" that can be found on album covers, song lyrics and "facts" in reality--all in conjunction with a pair of tapes that have George Harrison's voice going over the events and stating that Paul is really dead. If you can stop from laughing at the absurdity of it all and pull your palm away from your forehead that will find itself drawn like a magnet (those fuckin' magnets, how do they work?) as you will facepalm every two seconds, you will find a film that has most of its facts wrong and you will hope that no one takes this seriously.

On the IMDb boards, it's been argued that this "documentary" is a spoof--a joke playing off the conspiracy theory that some foolish people believe. I sure hope it is because it is appalling that they even unleashed this onto the world. First off, the film looses all credibility within the first three seconds because the company that produced it (Highway 61 Entertainment) shows a large office building with their logo badly photoshopped on. How can I take this film seriously when you've already lied to me, movie? The "documentary" continues by showing the director of the film stating that they received a package from England with no return address that has a tape recorder and two cassettes in it claiming to be the voice of George Harrison. The director explains that despite their forensic testing, they couldn't verify that it was, or wasn't, Harrison. Right there screams "bullshit" but once you hear the recording and notice it sounds nothing like George and that the English accent will strengthen, weaken or even disappear at times is all the forensic evidence I need to declare the tapes are something Penn & Teller love to say...BULLSHIT! It gets even worse when "George" says he recording these tapes in his hospital bed as he recovers from the attack he suffered (remember when he was attacked by a crazed fan in his own home?). Here's the problem with that...the audio is pristine and studio quality without a single shred of ambient or background noise. Little tape recorders don't have noise canceling microphones, so did this "George" get out of his bed to record his last testament in a studio before transferring it to mini-cassettes and sending it out to a production company that no one has ever heard of? Why didn't he send it to ABC, the BBC or even *shudder* Fox?

Bullshit becomes the word of the day as the film shows its "evidence" and screws up historical facts. For example, the film claims John Lennon started seeing Yoko after The Beatles broke up and that the fake Paul was involved in the recording of "Rubber Soul" despite the album came out in 1965 when the real Paul would have been alive. The "documentary" also claims there was one witness to Paul's death, a woman named Rita (Lovely Rita) and that MI6 gave her money and plastic surgery but when she was about to go public because Paul wouldn't marry her, they tried to have her killed and she ended up losing a leg but gaining a new identity...Heather Mills. The problem with that theory: Heather Mills was born two years AFTER Paul supposedly died.

That's just the beginning of the factual errors this film makes (believe me, it makes many more) so, deep down, I have to believe this was a spoof because if it wasn't, it's just a disgrace to documentary filmmakers everywhere. If this was real and the director believes the crap facts he placed before you and believes the man doing the bad impression is the real George Harrison, he should be committed to a facility because he clearly lacks the basic skills to even wipe his own ass. If this film was real and Highway 61 Entertainment was trying to convince people that this sludge is true, then every single freakin' copy of this DVD should immediately be destroyed with fire.

Even though this movie made me laugh with the sheer stupidity of it all, I am glad--NO PROUD!--to say that I did not pay a single dime to watch this hunk of excrement. If you are curious to see this dingle-berry of a documentary than I urge you to illegally download it. I would never EVER openly advocate the theft of copyright material in my blog but this horrible excuse for a movie must only be viewed that way. Highway 61 Entertainment and the director (Joel Gilbert) don't deserve a single penny. And if it was indeed a spoof...still illegally download it because it is that horrible. Then, after downloading it, delete the files and burn an effigy of Highway 61 Entertainment. My suggestion: Screencap the horrible photoshop picture of their "building," print it off and then burn it. Trust me, you'll feel better after watching this.

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