Thursday, July 5, 2018


***DISCLAIMER*** The following review is entirely my opinion. If you comment (which I encourage you to do) be respectful. If you don't agree with my opinion (or other commenters), that's fine. To each their own. These reviews are not meant to be statements of facts or endorsements, I am just sharing my opinions and my perspective when watching the film and is not meant to reflect how these films should be viewed. Finally, the reviews are given on a scale of 0-5. 0, of course, being unwatchable. 1, being terrible. 2, being not great. 3, being okay. 4, being great and 5, being epic! And if you enjoy these reviews feel free to share them and follow the blog or follow me on Twitter (@RevRonster) for links to my reviews and the occasional live-Tweet session of the movie I'm watching! Geostorm kinda sounds like a 90s video game system.

Geostorm – 3 out of 5

If you caught my review of The Hurricane Heist (check it out here or just scroll down to the review right after this one), you know I spent the very hot and humid previous weekend watching weather-based films.  Well, this one was the second feature in that little endeavor.  And, like the last one, the fact that Geostorm was featured on How Did This Get Made? is also one of the reasons why I watched it.

Thor is drunk again.

In the near future, the weather is now completely controlled by a series of satellites and endless tragedies have been averted.  However, when dangerous weather patterns start to mysteriously appear and the space station in charge of controlling the satellites starts to go haywire, it’s revealed that a virus has been implanted in the system and the entire operation is being sabotaged.  The chief engineer who designed the entire climate-control program; Jake Lawson (Gerard Butler), is recruited to return to the organization (after being fired for acting without authorization years prior) by his brother Max (Jim Sturgess).  Max and Jake fear that the president himself; Andrew Palma (Andy Garcia), is the man responsible for the sabotage but before they can get to the bottom of the mystery, they need to get the system under control before the entire weather system collides and forms a global cataclysmic event called a “Geostorm.”

Honestly, if this technology existed, I'd rather have this fictional president, or nearly
any random stranger, have control over it rather than the orange doofus we are
currently cursed with.

Geostorm is exactly what I wanted The Hurricane Heist to be.  It’s a silly, super over-the-top film that doesn’t take itself too seriously but isn’t being too goofy either.  I won’t try and argue that it is a great film or a meaningful one in anyway—hell, the film is really no different than anything else Dean Devlin has his name attached to (this was actually his feature directorial debut).  The movie is basically the same story in spirit and tone as Independence Day, the 90s Godzilla film and the works from Devlin’s buddy; Roland Emmerich, like 2012 and The Day After Tomorrow.  It follows a very specific formula and offers up no surprises or twists along the way--just a simple force of nature causing a whole lot of destruction…but it somehow still manages to ride that line of being kinda fun in its mediocrity and how dumb it realistically is.

Don't be upset, lady.  Your boyfriend couldn't keep up with you and outrun the cold
front chasing you.  You deserve better.

The familiarity of this story is definitely a contributing factor to why Geostorm is kinda enjoyable but the reason I find this one fun rather than grating like I did for 2012 and The Day After Tomorrow is the fact it has a ridiculous sci-fi reason for the weather going nuts and isn’t trying to be a preachy and completely tone-deaf and misguided story about morals and protecting the environment.  Having an antagonist use weather satellites to do shitty things works in this case and results in the grand scale death and destruction we’ve come to know from Devlin.  The simple act of the way this story is constructed made it very easy for me to suspend disbelief and just sit back and have fun with the madness I was watching unfold on my TV screen.

Meanwhile, Cobra looks on in insane jealousy.

Ed Harris is a damn intimidating man.
The final aspect of Geostorm that really got me into it was the cast.  One interesting element to the cast is how the climate-control satellite is created by several nations working together and this is reflected in a fairly diverse roster of players.  Sure, you still have the major roles going to white men but I won’t deny that at least the production looked like it was trying to be inclusive.  In addition, I felt Andy Garcia was a lot of fun as the president and, alongside him, is Ed Harris as the Secretary of State.  Harris is always a joy to watch because he so good at bringing the right level of intensity and this is no exception.  Ultimately, however, the best player was Gerard Butler.  Although reports on set suggested he had trouble remembering his lines, the guy is really delivering and is very charismatic as Jake Lawson. 

This. Is. GEOSTORM!!!

Geostorm hits all the right notes it needs to hit to be a dumb and fun popcorn action film.  The cast and special effects are legitimately good and the rest of the nonsense is just gratuitous fun and over-the-top spectacle.  The movie provides a lot of memorable and amusing moments and is capable of riding that line of being unapologetically silly and just serious enough that it created a humorous sound of me laughing with the film and not laughing at it.

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