Cockneys vs. Zombies – 4 out of 5
Boy, those zombies will take on anyone in a fight. They’ll fight the military, just ordinary humans, kids who refuse to stay in domiciles they are instructed to remain in, guys named Shaun, girls named Barbara, Japanese swim teams and they are REALLY fond of fighting strippers. But now they’ve turned their attention towards the cockneys…
|"There's is not something behind me. What do you think this is? A zombie movie?"|
|You fool! Zombies hate fake mustaches. Please don't|
tell me you have one of those stupid marker mustaches
on your finger because they really hate those!
|Not to get all agecist here but I can't tell who are the zombies and who are the old people.|
|I guess you can say that zombie doesn't have a leg to stand|
on--OW! A mysterious force punched me upside the head
before I could finish that lame joke.
|He seems a little too okay with the zombie bite.|
|Clearly she's trying to compensate for her lack of a penis...|
|"Oi! We're gunna put a clobberin' on you rotten muckers." |
(I think that's how cockneys talk...)
Once the zombies arrive, the film hits the perfect stride as it brings in some fantastic dark comedy with it. The gags are relentless and witty in their execution as the film will give you jokes about how slow zombies move (an old man with a walker is able to just barely stay ahead of them), some great gore gags (like a relentless zombie that won’t stop biting even after it takes some lead to the head) and even a pleasantly humorous offensive gag that involves a zombie baby.
|Watch this movie with a parent without a sense of humor or someone who is easily|
offended...once you get to this scene their reaction will be delightful.
That’s the real heart of it; the humor. The movie does the comedy extremely well and keeps the movie from becoming stale and repetitive. The fact it has decent actors, fun characters, a solid story and zombies that look extremely convincing and not something in your usual “get that zombie movie out there, make-up is of no consequence” movie, only act as re-enforcing agents that make the film that much stronger and more enjoyable.
|With this revelation, it's a wonder zombies can catch anyone at all.|
To boil it down, Cockneys vs. Zombies is basically a Guy Ritchie film with the walking dead added to it…which makes even more sense when you realize that Alan Ford, the guy who used pigs to dispose of his enemies in Snatch, is in this film and much of the fast-pace editing and backstory gags look suspiciously familiar. While the title suggests the film has the very real potential to be a piece of phoned-in crap with no imagination and effort behind it, CvZ is damn funny and very, very entertaining.
|"Can we get some pigs to be our allies to help take on the zombies?"|