Saturday, January 28, 2012

Porky's II: The Next Day

***DISCLAIMER*** The following review is entirely my opinion. If you comment (which I encourage you to do) be respectful. If you don't agree with my opinion, that's fine. To each their own. I am just sharing my opinions and perspective. Finally, the reviews are given on a scale of 1-5. 1, of course, being terrible. 2, being not great. 3, being okay. 4, being good and 5, being epic!

Porky's II:  The Next Day - 1 out of 5

A dude talking to his penis...yep, it's a Porky's movie.
Porky's was probably the first sex movie I ever saw as a kid but, for some reason, Porky's II:  The Next Day is more vivid in my memory.  I think because of that iconic scene where the gang puts a snake in the toilet to scare the female gym teacher.  Whatever the case, I've decided to re-watch it after all these years and, like my review of the first one the memories don't match the reality.

You know, for dudes trying to get some ladies, they spend an awful lot of time hanging on each other.
Just saying.

Like the previous one, the movie is about Pee Wee and the gang pulling pranks, trying to get laid and tolerating high school in the early 50s the best they can.  The main focus of this sequel is the gang joining the drama club and getting ready to put on a performance of some scenes from Shakespeare's most famous plays.  However, the local church gets involve and want the performance pulled because they deem it to be obscene and the local charter of the KKK want it over because a Native American is playing Romeo.  The church uses its pull in the government and gets the play called off but now the gang takes action to put these people in their places.

Are they at a Toby Keith concert?

Is that dude's jacket inside-out?
Like the previous film, the biggest problem with this comedy (other than the fact it's not funny) is the fact that the movie is a sloppy mess with no real plot connecting together a poorly put together story that feels more like a series of skits that coincidentally had the same theme so some editor decided to tie them all together.  Also, you would think by the second film I would start to recognize the gang by name or at least their faces but I found myself several times in the film saying, "Who's that guy?"  But when all your characters are cookie-cutter generic templates of 50s high school kids, can you really blame me for not knowing who each of them is?  If they all had stupid names like Pee Wee, maybe they would be worth remembering.

The Rev. Jerry Falwell in a rare performance from his youth.

It's hard to believe that the same man who gave us the timeless (and one of my personal favorite films) A Christmas Story gave us this and the first one.  However, Bob Clark was filming this the same time as the holiday favorite and it's obvious where he put all his creative energy.

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