Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Revenge of the Boarding School Dropouts

***DISCLAIMER*** The following review is entirely my opinion. If you comment (which I encourage you to do) be respectful. If you don't agree with my opinion, that's fine. To each their own. I am just sharing my opinions and perspective. Finally, the reviews are given on a scale of 1-5. 1, of course, being terrible. 2, being not great. 3, being okay. 4, being good and 5, being epic!

Revenge of the Boarding School Dropouts - 1 out of 5

Haven't heard of Revenge of the Boarding School Dropouts? Did you know it is a sequel to the film Shred? No matter what your answers were to those answers, I encourage you to continue to read because it would be downright foolish of me to suggest that you NOT read my blog.

Someday I want a snowboarding film with no snowboards. It'll blow your mind!

Revenge of the Boarding School Dropouts is a film about snowboarding. At its core, that's all you really need to know. But if you feel like peeling back the layers of this movie onion, here ya go: In 2009, for some reason that will remain a mystery, a sequel was made to the incredibly mediocre film Shred. This sequel continues the story left off from the original that sees Max and Eddy (two former mega-stars in the world of snowboarding) trying to get their students (the ones they worked so hard to establish in the first film) to hit the big time. However, Max and Eddy are spending too much time and too much energy on one of their pupils and the other two are getting jealous--then, to make matters worse, the stereotypical bad guy (because every sports film--especially one that involves large mountains covered in snow, needs an obvious bad guy) is out to court this beloved snowboarder for his own team.

Derp!

If you haven't, take the time to read my review of Shred (http://revronmovies.blogspot.com/2011/06/shred.html) because all the problems that overwhelmed that film is seen in this one. The jokes are unfunny even by sophomoric standards, the story can only be enjoyed by Monster Energy Drink swilling snowboarders and the acting is flat, to say the least. The film's protagonists comes off as douche bags so, if you're not a snowboarder, it's hard to cheer for anyone in this film since everyone lacks even a hint of decency or likeability. But this shouldn't be surprising when your leading man is Dave England from Jackass. I guess it's hard to have a proficient leading man when the actor you cast is known for diving into all sorts of human excrement.

"Anybody want to jump into some poo?"

The only reason I actually watched this film is the same reason I watched Shred: Tom Green was in it.

The look of anyone who sat through Revenge of the Boarding School Dropouts.

I'm a big fan of Tom Green because of the unique spin he brought to the world of comedy back in his heyday. So, one day, I checked out his IMDb page and added every film he's done. So, for better or worse, I made it my duty as a fan of the guy to watch his movies. And I'll just say it now: I think Freddy Got Fingered is a brilliant comedy that a majority of the critics and movie-going public didn't get (here's a hint: he was trying to make a bad, offensive comedy).

You could sand wood with that face.

So, since this was one of the films Tom did, I watched it. And I have to say, his performance is the only good part. Tom Green is no Shakespearean actor but neither is 80% of Hollywood. You really think Jessica Alba gets roles because she can act? Tom Green is no George Clooney but with the low level of talent the rest of the cast brings to this film, you would almost think he is. But even with Green's performance as the stereotypical bad guy, Kingsley, the flat, emotionless story, lame jokes, poor editing and bad acting, makes this one a film to run away from like it's a horny yeti on Dead Man's Peak. Revenge of the Boarding School Dropouts lacks even the proper amounts in these categories to even make the film one of those laughably bad ones.

1 comment:

  1. Students have enough time for remedial when they can conduct their own personal studies.

    Boarding School

    ReplyDelete

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