Sunday, June 26, 2011

Pinocchio's Revenge

***DISCLAIMER*** The following review is entirely my opinion. If you comment (which I encourage you to do) be respectful. If you don't agree with my opinion, that's fine. To each their own. I am just sharing my opinions and perspective. Finally, the reviews are given on a scale of 1-5. 1, of course, being terrible. 2, being not great. 3, being okay. 4, being good and 5, being epic!

Pinocchio's Revenge - 2 out of 5

I started to type the title of this film into Google and the top suggestion for searches was "Pinocchio's Revenge shower scene." Yes, this movies claim to fame is a single scene where a mildly attractive woman bares all (and I mean all) in a shower scene. In fact, so much is seen that there's no doubt she gave a copy of this movie to her gynecologist for her yearly check-up instead of actually making an appointment.

Shower scene aside, Pinocchio's Revenge is about a District Attorney with a case about a man being accused of being a serial killer. At the beginning of the film, he is caught trying to bury his murdered son with a wooden puppet named Pinocchio--not Disney's Pinocchio. Well, through a turn of events, the evidence in a murder trial (the puppet) ends up in the hands of the DA's daughter. Suddenly, the daughter starts talking to the doll and it seems that Pinocchio is hurting, even killing, people who get in the way. But the question is asked: Is it really Pinocchio committing these atrocities...or the daughter? Dun Dun Dunnnnn!!!!

Yep, that's the story that surrounds the shower scene or, as lonely men on the internet have called the non-shower scenes, "the useless crap the sets up and follows the hot chick in the shower."

From the movie's description, you can pretty much tell what you're going to get. It's almost a guarantee that the acting will be terrible because you already know the story is stupid. And, of course, these two elements make the movie watchable because there's an entertainment factor to them but what makes this even better to watch (and riff on as you do) is that it's clear the filmmakers believed they were making a deep psychological thriller...with a wooden puppet. The way the movie ends, you know the writer, director and producers were high-fiving each other with the false belief that they just made something amazing...and the way the actors ham up their roles, it's clear they too thought they were making the Citizen Kane of cheesy horror films.

Continuing to ignore the shower scene, Pinocchio's Revenge is a great movie because it's utter crap. It's easy to make fun of and will definitely keep you entertained with its plot holes and all around silliness...and of course, you have a hot shower scene.

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